just a thought....

ആഡംബരങ്ങള്‍ ഇല്ലാത്ത ആത്മാര്‍ഥമായ ജീവിതം

എന്നും കൈ തൊടാന്‍ പറ്റാത്ത ദൂരത്തായിരുന്നു 

എന്നിട്ടും ആഗ്രഹിച്ചു കൊതിച്ചു ജീവിച്ചു 

പഴകിയ മോഹങ്ങള്‍ പൊടി പിടിച്ചപ്പോള്‍ 

ഞാനും ആര്ഭാടത്തെ പുല്‍കി 

അപക്വമാം ഹൃദയം ഒഴുക്കില്‍ പെട്ട് നീങ്ങി 

പുറം പൂച്ചില്‍ ജീവിതം കൈ വിട്ടു തുടങ്ങിയപ്പോള്‍ 

കണ്ണ് നീര്‍ തുള്ളികലാല്‍ കഴുകപെട്ട എന്റെ സിദ്ധാന്തങ്ങള്‍ 

വഴി പിഴച്ച ജീവിതത്തിനു മുന്‍പില്‍ ഒരു നോക്കുകുത്തി

From south to east.....

Brought up in a traditional south Indian home, i have always been keen to inspect the elements of city life. but have always stayed carefully out of the system. my experiments were always limited to the relative experiences and desperately necessary situations totally explainable to me.. These experiments led me to correct so many myths that were installed in my head by a conventional traditional society that was desperate to protect it's assets. a girl was never thought to be as a wealthy asset though she was always the pride and caretaker of a man's home... well may be well may be i can explore my inner feminist later ... :)

The city's i have visited have always been kind to me. like i said, when i came to live in Chennai, i could see the colors of joy and sorrow dancing through the streets. always eager to hide and protect me under it's wings, the city took gave me a home away from home. the traditional and culture rich metro accepted me with joy... the life it offered was simple and traditional at times though posh and rich at times. but not even once did it confront me with the striking unfamiliarity of a big metro a girl who just migrated from a small town should feel.. 

But Kolkata with it's vibe and vigour surprised me. the words tradition and culture were redefined miles and miles away form where i first heard it. the way i heard it first, it meant talk less, work hard, look beautiful but bot stylish. (though i was an utter disappointment in both those aspects for people around me :) ). score high marks, watch less movies preferably at home. have less friends again preferably girls. By all these i don't mean i was any of this as the people who know me and reading this will know.. but yes my idea about being cultural and traditional was about the same... this was totally challenged by kolkata.. "The city of joy" was the first words i read when i set my foot in this place. This made me think about the joys this place could give me. though i smiled to myself thinking about the definition of the word joy and what it meant to me, i was proved wrong. 

The city with it's freedom and passion awed me in a way no man or book has ever done that.. i fell in love with the streets of kolkata that had it's order in-spite of the busy crowds. The colours this place had was only of joy and nothing else. The culture of the city was imbibed in it's people as well as it's streets. Honest and polite, they led me through their life. The  life in the streets surprised me the way the little girl who was studying at night on the street near her tired mother sleeping after a day's work. 

Am leaving this city today... but with a promise that i will be back... not to explore it or feel it but to immerse in it and live up to the life the city of joy is offering........

ഇനിയും വരുമോ എനിക്കായി ഒരു വിഷു ?
ബാല്യ കൌമാരനഗളുടെ നന്മയുമായി
ഹൃദയം തുളുമ്പുന്ന സ്വപ്നങ്ങളുമായി
പ്രണയം പൂക്കുന്ന കണി കൊന്നയായി
ഓര്‍മകളുടെ മധുരം നുണഞ്ഞു കൊണ്ട്
സംതുപ്തിയുടെ കൈ നീട്ടവുമായി
ഇനിയും വരുമോ എനിക്കായി ഒരു വിഷു ?

സ്ത്രീ സ്വാതന്ദ്ര്യം

ചിന്തകള്‍ സ്വതന്ത്രമായ നിമിഷം മുതല്‍ ഞാനും സ്വതന്ത്രയാണ് 

സ്വാതന്ത്രം ഒരു പെണ്‍കുട്ടി പര്മിതികളിലൂടെയാണ് അറിയുന്നത് 

സ്വന്തം സ്വാതന്ത്ര്യം അടിയറവു വെച്ച് ജീവിക്കുന്ന സ്ത്രീകളെ ഞാന്‍ ബഹുമാനിക്കുന്നു..

അത് കുടുംബങ്ങള്‍ക്ക് വേണ്ടി കാപട്യങ്ങളുടെ ആന്പോരിമയ്ക്ക് വേണ്ടി 

സ്വതന്ത്രമാകാത്ത ചിന്തകളുടെ ഭാരവുമായി ജീവിക്കുന്നവര്‍ നപുംസകങ്ങള്‍ 

സ്ത്ര്രീക്ക് മേല്‍ ആധിപത്യം സ്ഥാപിച്ചാല്‍ താന്‍ ജയിച്ചു എന്ന് വിശ്വസിക്കുന്ന മൂടന്മാര്‍ 

ഇവരോ ഒരു കുടുംബത്തെ സംരക്ഷികേണ്ടത്‌? ഇവരോ ഒരു സമൂഹത്തെ നയിക്കേണ്ടത്? 

സ്വയം ചോദിക്ക് നിങ്ങള്‍ ഇതിനു പ്രാപ്തരോ? അവളെ കൂട്ടിലിട്ട പോലെ എന്ധിനു ഇനിയും 

unemployed...

This is written with a mind set of a very normal middle class Indian girl who wants to have a life of her own. So please understand that my thoughts are not entirely based on my situation.

The word marriage goes on with different meaning... for a mother, it's missing her daughter, for a father, ts a responsibility reduced, for a friend, ts a best friend becoming just another friend and for a girl?  I doubt if it just means stop living from your parent's salary and start living from your husbands. well i have heard many guys saying hey you girls don't have top bother even if you people don't get a job, you will be married away. I have never cared to raise my voice against it ever, I have always remained silent about it though partly doubting and partly thinking about the structure of our society. but today when i am about to do it, i know exactly what it means. so now i tell this to every guy who has ever told me those lines, no it is never easy for any woman as qualified as you are to just ask someone for her living, talking about parents, that is a habit we get from childhood, when even that becomes a problem after some time, how about a totally new person? Is it just that easy???

Having a job is not only the foundation stone of your self esteem but i believe it is the last word in your independence too.. It is everything including the respect you get in terms of a productive family member in terms of a knowledgeable decision maker, it is everything you can ever have for yourself, If you believe the satisfaction of seeing your kids grow up and become successful individuals is what you want in life and for that you would prefer to stay as a house- wife, i am asking you what will you do the day after your kids walk away from you? sit back and relax? enjoy your retirement from house work? is that what you want? and that is not when you grow old. Nowadays this situation comes right at the time when your kid leaves for college, from then on you are just a part of their life, not everything, it's their decisions from then on not and never your's. so at that point, is waiting at home for your husband to return from work is all what you want? i wonder...


How about the relations you have at work, the contacts you make, the people you meet, the life you can have??? saying no to all this just because you can't find enough time to manage family and work? please don't do that ladies, you are going to regret. again at the staring everything might seem perfect, but i don't need to tell you , that seldom is the case. what if one fine day, you are in a situation to take care of a family? where will you turn? what will you do? you are so used to depending upon others. so don't loose your strength to stand up for yourself. don't ever think having a job is the reason for all the problems your family is facing. no it on the other hand is a solution to many other issues your family is unaware of currently.

Go out, find a job, have a life that will always help you balance the other side from your family when it comes to it.